Cut and Bless | Career Angles

Many years ago, I was asked to take the lead in the process during a workshop. I had attended it a few times but now was being asked to run a particular process I was not familiar with even though I had observed.

I thought I knew what I was doing, but I didn’t and it showed. The assistant manager for the workshop stepped in and took over for me. I was angry and hurt and started muttering under my breath. The muttering went on for more than a day.

My friend, Bobby, came over to me the next afternoon and asked what was wrong. I explained my grievance and fully expected to be agreed with. We were friends for several years now and never disagreed.

But this time was different.

I have been complemented by many times but what helped me grow and eventually help me lead others was “the cut” I received from Bobby.

“Jeff, you were f***ing up. You saved your bacon. This wasn’t about you. It is about the person you were trying to facilitate but weren’t. I knew you didn’t know what you are doing and, more importantly, you knew it, too, the person you are supposed to be helping knew it. You were f***ing up.”

“I love you too much to let you get away with this with yourself. I know you know the truth. Next time, you’ll know better, won’t you?”